I was delighted when I received an email inviting me to participate in the Love and Respect for a Lifetime Valentine’s Day blog tour. This gift book is a condensed version of Eggerich’s Love and Respect book, one I read several months ago. I was excited to see what the gift book offers.

The basic message of Love and Respect is that “when two become one, they have the potential of displaying God’s attributes and character” (pg 22). After all, Genesis 1:27 states that “God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created them.” How can we reflect the image of God? Eggerich suggests that “living out Ephesians 5:33 is the key to blending together as one to reflect the very image of God” (3).

Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband
Ephesians 5:33, NASB.
The rest of the book outlines various ways that a husband can love his wife even as himself and how a wife can demonstrate respect her husband.

Your husband knows you appreciate his desire to protect and provide when . . .

you praise his commitment to provide for you.

you empathize when he reveals his male mind-set about position, status, or rank at work.

you never put down his job or how much he makes (83).

This last suggestion is a big struggle for me. I don’t complain about how little or how much my husband earns, but I do stress about money. Essentially, overly stressing about paying bills, saving money, etc. sends the same message to my husband – that I don’t appreciate how much money he makes and how he provides for our family.

You show appreciation for your husband’s insight when . .

you thank him for his advice without acting insulted.

you let him “fix things” and applaud his solutions.

you thank him for his perception and godly counsel (92).

It’s easy to criticize when something goes wrong, but invaluable to offer a simple “thank you” when my husband does something right!

Your husband knows you value his friendship when . . .

you tell him you like him and you show it (he knows you love him, but he often wonders if you really like him).

you do recreational activities together.

you encourage him to open up and talk to you as you do things shoulder to shoulder (97).

I love this advice to tell him that you like him and then act like it! I love my husband very much. But sometimes, when I get stressed out, I treat him like I don’t even like him. This should not happen! My husband was my closest friend before he was husband and I need to be careful to protect that relationship.

And finally, one of my favorite pieces of advice:

If you listen before you answer . . .
if you think before you speak . . .
if your heart instructs your mouth . . .
then what you say will make your wife feel loved or your husband feel respected (113).
This advice really reflects another piece of excellent advice in James 1:19.

This you know, my beloved brethren
But everyone must be quick to hear,
slow to speak
and slow to anger.
I really enjoyed reading this little gift book. It reminded me of a lot of the advice offered in the full book, which I think is well worth a read. This book would make a great wedding or anniversary gift. If the couple would be willing to read the full version, that would be even better!

Disclosure – Thomas Nelson gave me a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.