Our daughter’s first book!

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I am so excited! Our daughter’s first book arrived today!

We’ve been on a spending freeze since we’re still funding our adoption. I keep wishing that we could start shopping for our daughter but the timing dictates that we wait.

I really, really wanted my first purchase for my daughter to be a Bible. It’s symbolic to me, giving a visual reminder of the desire we have to share Jesus with our children. I spent hours looking for a Chinese/English parallel Bible. I found quite a few but they all use simplified Chinese characters. Our daughter is from Taiwan, which still uses the traditional Chinese characters. If I bought her a simplified character Chinese Bible, she probably wouldn’t be able to read it. We finally discovered that we’ll need to visit a bookstore while visiting Taiwan to locate a traditional Chinese Bible.

My second attempt was focused on finding a good English children’s Bible. I had no idea there are literally thousands of options. I was completely buried in choices and had no idea what to buy. Because I had been saving Amazon credit, I was limited to buying something online instead of through a brick and mortar bookstore where I could spend time browsing.

Fortunately, I love to review books! When I visited Booksneeze’s website last month, I discovered that they were offering an NIV Bible for review called The Jesus Bible. The study helps and format are designed for children, while the Scripture translation is the traditional NIV. This Bible is geared for ages 9-12. Perfect! I’ll be reading a number of the study helps so that I can review this Bible version, since that’s why Booksneeze sent it to me.

I am ecstatic that I finally have something in my hands that was chosen specifically for our daughter. It makes the adoption just a little bit more real.

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“Cassandra, where is your faith?”

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Last week’s sermon hit me where it hurts – the need to work as a community instead of insisting on doing everything myself.

This week’s sermon also hit a sore point – not having enough faith that God is going to finish what He started. Our new pastor preached from Luke 8.

Now it came to pass on a certain day, that he went into a ship with his disciples: and he said unto them, Let us go over unto the other side of the lake. And they launched forth.

But as they sailed he fell asleep: and there came down a storm of wind on the lake; and they were filled with water, and were in jeopardy.

And they came to him, and awoke him, saying, Master, master, we perish. Then he arose, and rebuked the wind and the raging of the water: and they ceased, and there was a calm.

And he said unto them, Where is your faith? And they being afraid wondered, saying one to another, What manner of man is this! for he commandeth even the winds and water, and they obey him.

The pastor talked about the traditional interpretation of this passage. “Where is your faith?” The pastor said that we, himself included, usually think of this passage as a reassurance that God is ruler of the winds and the waters. God is all powerful. And that’s true!

But the pastor pointed out another application of this passage. Jesus asks, “where is your faith?” Why would He ask this? Because He told the disciples that they would reach the other side of the lake! When Jesus says that something is going to happen, it will. When He and the disciples set out in the boat, Jesus said that they were going to go over unto the other side of the lake. His Word is sure.

This message applies to our adoption. “Where is your faith?” God gave us reassurance that we are going to adopt. When we first started praying to determine if adoption was God’s will for our lives, He reassured us that it was. One morning, when I was opening up my Bible to read that day’s Psalm, my Bible fell open to Isaiah 54:1-3.

Sing, O barren, thou that didst not bear; break forth into singing, and cry aloud, thou that didst not travail with child: for more are the children of the desolate than the children of the married wife, saith the Lord.

Enlarge the place of thy tent, and let them stretch forth the curtains of thine habitations: spare not, lengthen thy cords, and strengthen thy stakes;

For thou shalt break forth on the right hand and on the left; and thy seed shall inherit the Gentiles, and make the desolate cities to be inhabited.

As an interesting side note, I’m typing this out of a different Bible than the one I was reading that morning. Isaiah 54:2 is circled in this Bible. I first marked this passage years ago. God is faithful.

If God has reassured me along the way that adoption is His will for our family, where is my faith? Why do I doubt His plan for our family?

Last week we started a fundraiser, feeling overwhelmed that we need just over $10,000 in one month in order to continue our adoption. In the last seven days, we’ve been blessed with over $1,600 contributed to our adoption account. God is good. He has promised that He will finish what He started.

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Equipping the Called

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I have a pride problem. There. I admitted it.

When I realized a week ago that we need a miracle, I started struggling.

I can do it on my own.
We are self sufficient.
Why do I have to come up with the money now?
I can’t admit to the whole world that I need financial help.

Prideful.

Even though I’m aware that it’s there, I’m still struggling with it. It’s hard to admit that we need help. But then I went to church on Sabbath and heard a message.

The sermon title was “Formed for God’s Family.” The speaker talked about four levels of fellowship. One of the levels is friendship, learning to share. He read Acts 2:44-45, which says “now all who believed were together, and had all things in common, and sold their possessions and goods, and divided them among all, as anyone had need.” He also talked about how we are to share each other’s problems and quoted Galatians 6:2. “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”

I felt convicted. We are not to live life on our own, relying on ourselves. We are to first rely on God. Then, we lean on each other. We’re not in this alone.

So I ask for your help. If you are a believer in God, can you pray for us? Pray that God’s will be done in our adoption. Pray that we will find peace in His decision, no matter what it is. And pray for that dear girl in Taiwan who is still waiting for a baba and mama. If you feel led, will you consider helping us fund our adoption?

A friend reminded me yesterday that God does not call the equipped. He equips the called. God has called us to adoption. Now we need to rely on Him to equip us to do His will.

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A God of miracles

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We need a miracle.

This morning we had a phone conference with the Taiwan coordinator. The agency in Taiwan has expressed some concern over our negative net worth. While they want to approve our adoption, they are afraid that the judge will reject our application. The agency is asking if there is any way that we can bring our net worth up to a positive number.

We need $11,000 in order to do that. We need a miracle. I am praying for a miracle.

If we are not able to improve our net worth, we will probably have to postpone the adoption. The option of submitting our application with a negative net worth was never presented, which makes me believe that we have two options. Either we fix the negative net worth or we wait to adopt until our net worth has improved.

I am trying so hard not to be discouraged. God has already worked miracles in our lives over the past eight years. Both my husband and I made bad financial decisions right out of high school. Both of us ran up credit card debt. Both of us borrowed money to attend college. Neither of us have a bachelors degree. Between the college loans and the credit cards and financing a car, we had a combined total of $96,000 of debt.

Then we found Dave Ramsey. We put together a budget. We saved a small emergency fund. We started prioritizing our debt payments. We made progress. We paid off a very large chunk of debt.

Then we both lost our jobs due to layoffs. God worked a miracle during that six month period. Even though the budget made no sense, even though the spreadsheet shows we should have missed payments, God provided. When Jeff was hired at his current job, his salary was enough to cover what both of us had made before. Despite six months of small unemployment checks, we met all of our financial obligations. And when Jeff started his new job, we had an even greater understanding of the need to be debt free.

After several years, we had made enough progress that we started praying for God’s leading to move to the northwest. Jeff asked his employer if he could be allowed to move and work 100% remotely. The employer said yes! We packed up our car, shipped a few boxes, and moved to Washington.

We spent several months saving up money, sleeping on an air mattress, so that we could pay cash for some furniture. God provided. Then we decided it was time to start eliminating the student loans. We sent several large payments but God started impressing my husband that it was time to step out in faith and adopt a child. We’ve seen God’s hand in our adoption so far.

Now we’re getting ready to submit our dossier to court and have hit a road bump. Taiwan’s culture is such that people pay cash for college. It is a lot cheaper to attend college in Taiwan than in the US. Student loans are unheard of.

At this point in time, our adoption is 2/3 paid for. Part of the money has already been submitted to various agencies and fees. Part of the money is sitting in our savings account, waiting for the next step in the process. A process that has been halted. When you put our financial situation on paper, we make a good income. But we own very few “things” and thus have a very low number in the Asset column. We still owe $30,000 in student loans and thus have a big number in the Liabilities column. When you add them together, we have a negative net worth.

I truly believe God told us to step out in faith and apply to adopt a beautiful girl in Taiwan who needs a family. I’ve seen His hand at work in the past six months. Now we need $11,000 to continue the adoption proceedings. We need a miracle. I am praying for a miracle.

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Wrapping up loose ends

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We are still waiting for the contracts to be returned from Taiwan so that our dossier can be notarized and authenticated. Because we’re still waiting, I haven’t felt an urgent need to print the last couple pages necessary for the dossier or assemble the family photographs.

Today I decided it was time. I don’t want to get caught unawares when the contracts arrive only to scramble to print the last few pieces of documentation. So today I took the last two photos that were needed, our dining room/kitchen and the back side of our house. I assembled the eight photos requested and printed them. I also printed the Washington state adoption laws. Now our dossier is ready for notarization and authentication as soon as those contracts arrive!

I hope the judge doesn’t look too closely at our “dining room.” We’ve been using it as an office since we moved in! Before our daughter comes home, we plan to buy a kitchen table and chairs so that we can eat dinner together properly.

And, strangely enough, I’ve never stepped out the back door to take a look at the back of our house! We don’t have a backyard per se, so there is no reason for me to go out the back door.

I can’t wait until we’ve saved up all of the adoption fees so that we can start furnishing our daughter’s room! It looks rather bare now but we’re excited to start furnishing it later this spring.

We did receive a very minor piece of news today! The National Visa Center has kindly informed us that our I-171H has now been forwarded to the American Institute in Taiwan (AIT), which is located in Taipei, Taiwan. The AIT is also the “visa-issuing post where the adoption interview will take place.” How exciting!

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New Year’s resolutions

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I’ve always been a big fan of New Years because I love writing resolutions. I love the feeling of starting a new year with new goals and aspirations. Over the past year, however, I’ve discovered that I need something more than New Year resolutions. While they are inspirational, if I don’t make a detailed plan of how I am going to accomplish each resolution, I fail. I forget. I get derailed.

This year I’m going to do something different. I’m not making any New Year’s resolutions. Instead, I’m going to focus on just two things.

Bring my daughter home.

Finish all of the half completed projects around the house before we travel to Taiwan.

That’s it.

I get excited about projects, work on them for awhile, and then neglect them. As a result, I have at least a half dozen projects in various states of completion. A homemaker’s schedule. Several knitting projects. Two quilts. A recipe book.

There are probably a few other things as well. Over the next week, I’m going to walk around my house and poke into all of the bags and notebooks to find out what has been started but not completed. When our daughter comes home, I probably won’t have time for personal projects. We will be spending all of our time and energy helping her learn what it’s like to live in a family, teaching her English, and determining her education level. I’m sure we’ll be busy.

Maybe, in a way, I do have a New Year’s resolution – to go to Taiwan without any loose ends plaguing me. As I have no idea when we’re traveling, I don’t know how much time I have to complete everything. It will be at least six months but hopefully less than a year. I’d better get busy!

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Approved!!

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It has been a long process for one approval.

10/8 – Mailed off our I-600A application.
10/11 – USCIS receives our application.
10/16 – We are logged into the system.
11/1 – We receive an RFE (request for further evidence).
11/5 – FBI fingerprinting!
11/14 – Mail off RFE paperwork.
12/17 – Discover Jeff’s birth year is incorrect on the home study.
12/18 – Home study is corrected.
12/19 – APPROVAL!! (We don’t know it yet)
12/27 – We receive verbal confirmation of approval.
12/30 – We receive approval in the mail.

Whew!

Today is a monumental day. First, we received the approval we need to progress with the dossier. And today marks exactly six months since we decided to adopt our girl. We can’t wait to officially become her mama and baba!

*Post edited – Because Z has refused adoption, I have removed her pictures to protect her privacy.
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Still no immigration approval

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I was feeling very frustrated this afternoon that we still have not received the decision on our I600-A application. I know the officer told us that it would be 7-10 days before we received notice but I was really, really hoping to know before Christmas. Maybe it will arrive Thursday, as that would be one week after Jeff talked to the officer.

I’m having a hard time with the unknown. I keep reminding myself that God knows best. That His timing is working out perfectly so far so that we can pay all of the adoption fees as they come due. But it’s still hard to wait. I am such an impatient person.

Today I came across this quote:

Sometimes we see what God sees as “better” and it makes sense. Sometimes we don’t. The joy of God is that we don’t have to see it – we can just know that His is better. All the time. No matter what. For His is the eternal view with everlasting impact based in love. His love for me. –Casa de Alegria

I am grateful for the reminder and I pray for patience to wait on God. His way is better. His timing is better. I just have to trust Him.

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Medical Clearance – Completed!

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We received a voicemail from the doctor’s office on Saturday afternoon that our medical clearances were ready to be picked up. Hallelujah! As soon as they opened this morning, I was in their office picking up our precious forms. My favorite line:

Is the adoption applicant’s state of health suitable for raising a child? Yes!

And that assurance is signed and notarized. Woohoo!

The last big piece of paperwork needed before dossier submission is the I171-H approval, which gives us authorization to bring a child into the United States. When Jeff talked to USCIS last Thursday, they said we should have the decision in the mail sometime this week. We hoped it would arrive today. I stalked the mailbox. But no approval today. Maybe tomorrow?

We’ve been waiting for this immigration approval since the beginning of October and it has been nerve-wracking. We feel that it’s the last approval that judges us as potential parents. Everything after this point is just paperwork, just formalities. We have been scrutinized under a microscope and the immigration approval gives that final vote of approval that we need.

A friend has reminded us that it WILL come because God has had His hand all over our adoption process thus far. I’m still asking God to help grow my faith!

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